No matter what positions you decide to try, know that extending
foreplay will make sex more enjoyable for you and your partner and not
only because it builds arousal
- Communicate
Whether
or not you feel self-conscious about your ability to pleasure your
partner, it’s important to keep the lines of communication open.
“Partners need to communicate about many aspects of their sexual
relationship,” says Dr. Leora Manischewitz, a clinical psychologist and
licensed sex therapist in New York City. “Pleasuring each other is not a
given, rather something that two people teach each other.
A
woman may need a specific means of stimulation to achieve orgasm and a
man may need a specific way of being stroked in order to achieve an
erection. In the same way, the size of a man's penis may be a topic for
conversation. Lovers who respect each other will talk about this with
openness and acceptance. They will discuss ways to work around it and
work together to find positions that enhance pleasure for each partner.”
- Try rear entry
Once
you’ve discussed any concerns with your partner, it’s time for the fun
part: experimenting and finding what works best for you! One position
that experts agree is sure to take both you and your lady on a wild
ride: doggy style.
“There are certain positions
that enhance friction and sensations. For example, ‘doggy style’ with
the man in the back and the woman on her knees in front of him, usually
offers the woman intense sensation during penetration, especially if she
squeezes her thighs together,” says Manischewitz.
Fleming
agrees that having the woman squeeze her legs together can make sex
feel more pleasurable for both partners, adding “Rear entry is a good
position for men who are smaller in size because it can allow him to
reach her G-spot, which is about 3-inches inside the anterior vaginal
wall.”
- Use props
For
a man with a small penis, sex is all about finding the best angles,
Fleming tells us. “Definitely use your environment, furniture, and other
props to find the best angles and depth of penetration for you and your
partner. While doing standing doggy style, for example, try putting
your hands on a chair,” says Fleming.
Putting
pillows under her hips when she’s on the bottom can also help you get
deeper, creating the "full" feeling many women like, says sex coach and
certified sexuality educator, Amy Levine.
“That
said, women primarily climax from clitoral touch. Try using a small
vibrator on her clitoris while you thrust to boost sensation and
pleasure. As she becomes more aroused her vaginal walls will tighten,
making sex more pleasurable for you, too.”
- Skip the lube
The one thing you shouldn’t keep
in your sex arsenal? Lube. “If she is naturally well lubricated, don’t
add more. A little friction will increase sensation,” explains Fleming.
However, be advised that if she’s dry, penetration may feel
uncomfortable regardless of size. So you’ll want to focus on turning her
on and getting her juices flowing before you start bumping and
grinding.
- Have her put her legs up
If
getting deeper inside her is what you crave, ask her to put her legs
over your shoulders in the missionary position. “This allows for greater
sensation and pleasure, notes Manischewitz. You can also try having her
lay with her butt on the edge of the bed or couch, legs up.
“When
you enter her in this position it can maximize what you’ve got,” says
Levine, adding “you basically want vaginal access without obstruction of
other body parts.”
- Let her climb on top
Another
position worth trying is woman-on-top. “It’s one of the best strategies
for a guy with a smaller penis, as it allows the woman to maximize her
partner’s length and position him in a way that feels good to her,”
explains Levine. “It also gives you (or her!) the ability to stimulate
her clitoris which is often needed to reach the big O.”
To
make sure you don’t slip out as she’s ridin’ dirty, have her rock and
grind against you, rather than move up and down, advises Fleming.
- Extend foreplay
No
matter what positions you decide to try, know that extending foreplay
will make sex more enjoyable for you and your partner and not only
because it builds arousal, which as Fleming explains, is key to having
more intense orgasms.
If you’re self-conscious
about your size or your ability to please a woman, fooling around (and
bringing her to orgasm) before going all the way can help take the
pressure off during the main event.
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